Thoughts on: Amazon’s bestiality rules

Well, here’s an interesting subject, eh? Lillian and I have discussed it at length, but recently I have had the opportunity to discuss it with non-writers. Specifically ,I have discussed this with my father, and a friend (I said my family was pretty open about all this, right?).

Generally, Lillian and I have swallowed (heh) Amazon’s rules without questioning it. What we have gathered is this – humans can have sex with humans, animals can have sex with animals. ‘Shifter’ stories are allowed (woohoo) as long as there is only intercourse between characters who are in the same species-state. So even if it’s two werewolves, they can’t Do The Deed if one is in wolf form and one is in human form. That makes it bestiality, and that is not allowed.

Seemed fine to me.

Then I tried explaining this to my father. My father, for the record, is very open about this kind of thing, but this whole idea seemed strange to him. Try as I might, I couldn’t explain it in a way that made him understand.

Perhaps I will have to start giving out free copies of some of my work for people to read, so they can understand the, for want of a better word, attraction in shifter smut. Or maybe it’s a pleasure which only you, my dear reader, and I, share. Who knows?

The friend I discussed it with just shook her head, laughed, and wandered off. I’m still not sure what to make of that.

I’d love to discuss this with more people, so please do comment – though if your comments are aggressive towards anyone’s tastes and preferences, they may not be published. Porn is for everyone 🙂



The Personal Assistant Book 1- New Hire

Live (and, for once, fresh and actually on-time with the announcement) now – The Personal Assistant Book 1 – New Hire.

Andrew Phillips is a normal young man, down on his luck. Fresh out of university, he finds himself jobless, loveless, and hopeless. A chance meeting with Rob Truman, the black sheep third son of a very rich technology family, changes all that.


This is my longest book to date, at a whopping 58 pages / 22k words. See the innocent meeting of our lovely young men, all the way to their steamy encounters and moral dilemmas.

Buy it here:


Valentine’s Day

Happy Valentine’s Day to one and all.

Now, I’m not against romance and love at all (well, how could I be, really, writing what I write?) but I’m finding Valentine’s Day a bit tiring this year, though I won’t go into why exactly.

Instead, I want to remind everyone – love yourself. Strive to love who you are, and being in your own company. There’s something so wonderful about not feeling that you need someone else to make you happy.

Having said that, if you have anyone you love – partners, friends, relatives – take the time to tell them. Not just today, but tell them as often as you can. It’ll only strengthen the bonds between you, it’ll cheer them up, and make you feel good. Also, lets face it – we unfortunately never know when will be the last time we speak to someone.

How to choose a pen name

So, now that you know Isabella Cooke is a pen name, I feel I can give some advice on how to choose a name. This info is gathered from various sources and advice from other sites, long with my own findings and experience. Obviously with a leaning towards erotica pen names.

First off, you have to decide what kind of pen name you’re aiming for. Do you want something rather normal, like ‘Sarah Clarkson’? This kind of name is less obviously a pseudonym. It’s a believable name. The other end of the spectrum would be what I’d call a ‘porn name’. ‘Dick Hunter’ is a good example of this kind – you know that either it’s a very unfortunate name, or it’s to do with porn.

Both have their pros and cons. A porn name means that no-one is going to mistake what you’re about. They can often be a bit humorous, and act as something to draw in readers, all by themselves. However, people might not take you as seriously. It might make readers question the literary merit of what you write.

On the other hand, a normal name can give you a bit more legitimacy. People won’t question how serious you are and might assume that you at least put all you can into your writing, instead of coming across too jokingly. It is, however, a bit boring. It won’t draw readers to you, as you’re just another person.

The next major choice would be to pick your pen name’s gender. There’s plenty of argument that you should pick the gender which fits best with your target audience. There’s also an argument that it’s easiest to have the gender as your own gender.

Once you’ve decided all this, it’s just a case of picking a name. It should be rather simple, as writers pick names for characters all the time. Think of your pen name as a character and name them. It’s pretty simple… in theory. This step took me the longest. I aimed to have a list of five names to take through to the next step.

The next step – test the names. Mull them over in your head. Consider introducing yourself as your pen name. Does it get the response you want? Any that don’t fit right, discard. If you’re running out, come up with some new ones.

When you’ve got names you think you like, it’s time for the usability check. This is simple, but also very important. Google your pen name. Search the stores where you intend to sell your books. Search Facebook. What comes up?

Sarah Clarkson ( is already an established author on Kindle, so I wouldn’t use that. There’s no point in getting your books muddled up with someone else’s – it’ll probably mean losing sales.

Isabella Cooke ( is only similar to someone who has posted one book on Kindle, and it’s nothing like what I write, so I’m quite happy to use the name.

The Google and Facebook checks are important too though. If your pen name is only the real name of one person, it’s a bit tight to use it – imagine if you had a very uncommon name, and someone with your name became well-known online for writing smut. That’s potentially all kinds of embarrassing. On the other hand, if your name is the same as a million other people’s, then you’ll be lost in a crowd. Finding balance is good.

If you’re really fond of a name but it doesn’t pass these checks, maybe try changing the name slightly. Sarah Clarkson can become Sarah Clarke without too much difficulty. Dick Hunter could become Dick Fisher (…. okay, maybe not 😉 ).

Most importantly with this, don’t rush. with any luck you’ll be making money under your pen name for years to come, so it has to be one you’re happy with.

The dangers of self-publishing: Being found out

I daresay this is a danger which mostly relates to writing erotic romance or other ‘dubious’ books, but one of the dangers I have been struggling with is that of being found out.

At which point, of course, I have to admit that Isabella Cooke is a pen name. I’m sure no-one is surprised, but my apologies to anyone who is. The pen name alone took a lot of effort, actually. I toyed around with several names in my head, and then did research on a few – checking if they were used, checking if there was the right number of people with the same name, etc, etc.

So not only do I want to keep my pen name because of all the work it took, but I want to not be found out for writing smut. And I’m sure we all have at least one friend or family member who would look at us askew if they knew about us and smut.

What can you do though? All my accounts go through several dummy emails thanks to email-forwarding by Gmail. If there has to be a link to the ‘real’ me, I’d rather it wasn’t too obvious after all. Some of the rejected pen-names have their own email addresses just for this purpose.

My bio is a mix of facts about me, facts about friends, and a little sprinkling of imagination.

I’m still struggling with how to take an author photo. Maybe there will be a mask and wig involved. I don’t know yet. I need to get my masks and wigs down from the attic 😉

Of course, even being careful, I run my mouth off – because hey, I’m writing, and I’m scraping in money (well, a pittance, but still) and it’s still kinda cool. So I may have told a few people about it. I wouldn’t advise doing it how I did. It’s cool if your family can support and encourage your choice to write porn (and hey, they should ideally), but nothing makes Christmas dinner as mildly awkward as discussing how one member of the family writes porn. Porn involving horses. Yep. Awkward.

Author bias: Themes

Another author bias that has been bugging me – themes, feelings, moods, set pieces – whatever you want to call it, I’m sure there are all things which we stay away from or veer towards.

Now, I like romance, and storybook endings . . . but  the world has thrown too much at me for that to get a look-in any more. I’m cynical and grouchy instead.

I’d love it if my themes could be unending love, happily-ever-afters, etc. Instead, my themes seem to be trouble, hardship and anguish. Oh, I’m not quite going to plumb the full depths of that just yet, sure, but I don’t have people riding off into the sunset. In fact, I’ve had a few characters watching their loved ones riding away from them (and for any psychologists out there, that doesn’t quite line up to my past as you’d think, trust me).

It makes me sad in a way that my bias is towards sadness. If you’ve got a happy bias, maybe throw some pointers about how to write happy stuff?

If you want to write more miserable stuff, I can only really give you this: It’s the moment before the kiss which has most tension, and – as with music – that needs to be resolved. If it isn’t, you’re just twisting the knife.